Rest Easy, Robert: Remembering a Curmudgeon With a Heart of Gold

He was a curmudgeon. At least, that’s what he wanted everyone to think. Beneath the grumpy old man act was a heart the size of Texas. He would have described himself as average or “not much,” but to me, he was 10 feet tall — a man I always admired and respected.

I first met Robert at a coffee shop in Johns Creek. My wife had connected with him earlier through a mutual friend after her Crohn’s Disease diagnosis—Robert had been navigating those waters all his life and wanted to help. When I finally met him, my wife and I shared our dream of starting Act Together Ministries. Robert immediately believed in what we were doing and gave us the seed money to launch the nonprofit, which naturally led to him becoming one of our first board members and guiding us every step of the way.

In ministry work, he was the vice-chairman for Act Together and I was the chairman. I think he only had to lead one meeting in my absence in the entire 16 years we worked together — but his wisdom was second to none.

My wife and I started Act Together in our late 20s. Robert had worked in the business, accounting, and nonprofit world our entire lives and he was one of the wisest people I ever met. In 16 years he never once gave us bad advice or steered us in the wrong direction.

He was our first and longest serving board member, but he was so much more than that. He was a mentor to both of us, a confidant to my wife who prayed for her, visited her in the hospital, and helped her through her illness.

He was a man of prayer and he prayed even when it hurt. He never had kids, but I knew from the way he spoke of his nieces and nephews that he wanted them. He prayed for us through our infertility and he rejoiced when we finally had children, even though I know it must have ached inside. Having watched other people have kids when I couldn’t, I know that pain all too well. But Robert still rejoiced and if he felt any resentment, he never let on.

He encouraged my wife when we had our first child. She wanted to be a great mother and Robert always admired his mom. My wife asked him what it was that made her so amazing. Robert told my wife she already had what it took to be a great mom, and he had no doubts she would be. He did tell her to read to our kids often. He’d be proud if he knew just how much she reads to them.

Over the years he was a mentor, a friend, and a sparring partner who could match wits with me and who could top my sarcasm. He told me he liked how I said things that most Christians are afraid to say, but I’m pretty sure he thought I might get struck down for it at any moment. Maybe that’s why he always stood a safe distance away.

Robert died on Tuesday. His big heart finally gave out on him. I lost a friend and mentor, my wife lost a kindred spirit who wanted to leave the world a better place than he found it, our ministry lost a fountain of wisdom we will never be able to replace, and the world lost one of the most humble and honest people who ever lived.

He didn’t make it to Thanksgiving this year, but for many years, we spent Thanksgiving together, serving meals at Act Together’s community Thanksgiving gatherings. He was calm in chaos, grace under fire, and a voice of reason even when dealing with unreasonable people. I always admired those qualities in him and wanted to get there one day, but it’s still a long way off for me.

You don’t know him. He wouldn’t want you to. I fully expect him to haunt me for writing this column singing his praises. Robert Covington was one of a kind. He was the type of guy you could go months without speaking to, but he’d be right there the moment you needed something. When my wife told him Act Together was getting a lot of requests for food assistance this year due to SNAP cuts, he said he would be more than happy to make a donation to help. It was their last conversation.

He told us many times that he would walk across hot coals for us if needed, and then went on to prove it time and time again.

Rest easy, Robert. You made the world a better place and we will never forget everything you did for the crazy young couple that had an impossible dream.