No New Year’s Eve would be complete without a hilarious warning from a Georgia Sheriff’s Office on social media. This year, the Candler County Sheriff’s Office — one of Georgia’s funniest social media law enforcement presences — wins the Internet for its reminder that if you get too rowdy on New Year’s Eve, they have a room ready for you at the jail.

Here is their post:

🚨 Sheriff’s PSA: New Year’s Eve Edition

Alright y’all, we tried to keep it light… but here’s the deal:

The Candler County Jail STILL has room. 😬

We know, we know – disappointing for those banking on overcrowding as a free pass to get wild tonight. Spoiler alert: Even if we do run out of room, we’ve got plenty of Sheriff friends nearby who’d love to host you for the night. And oh – fun fact – we’re building a shiny new jail with all the bells and whistles as we speak. So, long-term planners… you’re not out of luck either.

Now for the important part – how to avoid becoming our guest:

👉 Enjoy yourself – but if you can’t remember how you got there, you did it wrong.

👉 Respect others – nobody needs to square up over the last gas station roller dog (the young folks call them glizzys) at 2 AM.

👉 Don’t break the law – we get paid to notice. You might be quick, but we know where you live.

👉 Fireworks + mailboxes = new address courtesy of the county.

👉 If it starts with “hold my beer,” just… don’t.

👉 Call us for a ride if you’ve been drinking. Seriously, we’d rather be your Uber than your warden.

👉 Leave exes, random Facebook rants, and drive-thru drama alone tonight. I promise, it can wait until you’ve had a nap and regret kicks in.

Oh, and one last thing – tomorrow’s jailhouse menu?

I’ll tell ya what it won’t include:

❌ Aunt Mary’s famous greens

❌ Uncle Charlie Joe’s pork butt

❌ Cousin Sara’s cornbread

❌ Anything remotely resembling the magic that Grant’s Café used to serve up. (Man, I miss that place.)

Instead, you’ll get a county-issued, dietitian-approved plate. 🥴

Unless you pre-order commissary. I’m not sure if that’s allowed, but hey – check with the Sheriff if that’s your thing. Bussin’.

So, if you’re craving good eats tomorrow, keep yourself out of trouble tonight. Otherwise, enjoy that mystery gravy.

Happy New Year! 🎉 Don’t make me come get you.